How to Be a Good Stepdad

Are Autism And Mental Illness Punishments From God? A Biblical Answer

Finding Truth, Hope, and Encouragement for Families

When Autism and Mental Illness Are Misunderstood

My friend Chris recently reached out to me, deeply troubled. His young nephew has autism, and some of Chris’s religious friends told him that autism and mental illness are punishments from God. With a heavy heart, he asked me, “Could that be true?”

My Response to Chris


Chris, I want to reassure you: autism and mental illness are not punishments from God. Scripture tells us that:

Love comes from God

God is love (1 John 4:7-10 NIV)

7 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.

8 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.

9 This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him.

10 This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.

Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

and that every person is “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:13-16 NIV)

13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.

16 Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

Created in God’s Image

Your nephew, like every child, is created in God’s image (Genesis 1:27 NIV)

So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.

and carries infinite worth and dignity. Challenges such as autism or mental illness are not signs of God’s anger but part of the brokenness of our world. Jesus consistently showed compassion to those who suffered—never condemning them, but offering healing, acceptance, and love.

Your nephew is a precious gift. God has a plan and a purpose for his life (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV).

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Rather than viewing autism as a curse, we can see it as one of the unique ways God shapes a life, filling it with distinct strengths, perspectives, and possibilities.

When the Disciples Asked the Wrong Question

In John 9:1–3 NIV, we read:

1 As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth.

2 His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”

3 “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.”

The disciples assumed the man’s blindness was punishment—a direct result of sin. But Jesus overturned their thinking. He made it clear: suffering or disability is not God’s judgment. Instead, it can be the very place where God’s glory is revealed.

Breaking the Myth

Even today, some still suggest—whether quietly or openly—that autism, depression, or bipolar disorder are punishments from God. But that belief does not align with Scripture or the heart of God.

God is loving, not cruel. Psalm 103:8-12 NIV reminds us:

8 “The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.

9 He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever;

10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.

11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him;

12 as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.”

Disability does not equal sin. Jesus himself rejected that idea in John 9.

The truth is, we live in a fallen world. Since the fall of Adam and Eve described in Genesis 3, brokenness and illness have touched creation. But these struggles are not punishments for individual wrong doing.

What God’s Word Really Says About Affliction

  • God draws near to the hurting. Psalm 34:18 NIV states:

“The Lord is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

  • Every life reveals God’s purpose.

    Just as the blind man’s story became a testimony of God’s power, so too can the lives of those with autism or mental illness reveal His strength and glory.

  • We are called to support, not judge. Galatians 6:2 NIV tells us:

“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”

Encouragement for Stepfamilies and Parents

If you’re a stepdad, stepmom, or parent navigating autism or mental illness in your family, take heart:

  • See the person, not the diagnosis. Every child is a beloved creation of God, filled with unique gifts and potential.

  • Don’t walk alone. Lean on your church, a counselor, or a supportive community. God did not design you to carry this weight alone.

  • Remember God’s bigger story. What the world labels as weakness may be the very place where God’s strength shines brightest.

Hope That Endures

Autism and mental illness are not punishments. They are part of life in a broken world. But the promise of God remains: nothing—not illness, not disability, not even death—can separate us from His love (Romans 8:35–39 NIV).

35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?

36 As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”

37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers,

39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

So when doubts creep in, remember Jesus’ words:

“Neither this man nor his parents sinned… but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.”

God is still at work—in every struggle, every diagnosis, every life. And His love is big enough to hold us all.

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About the author

About the author

In 1995, Gerardo became a stepdad to two children, a boy and a girl, ages 14 and 10. In 2011, he started the website Support for Stepfathers to reverse the nearly 70% divorce rate for blended families in the United States. His website is to help and inspire stepfathers, aspiring stepfathers, and the women who love them worldwide. You can follow Support for Stepdads on Twitter and Facebook.

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