All jokes aside, it’s true the changes to a child during the adolescent years are hard to handle for most parents. Especially when your once sweet and adorable daughter who just yesterday wore tutu skirts becomes angry, depressed or defiant.
As if that isn’t enough, there are all the physical changes she’s going through and, of course, the thing dads hate the most – boyfriends. Dads especially stepdads often make the mistake of voluntarily declaring themselves as bench players during this these years.
Her First Period
It very easy to pass on the conversations regarding your daughter’s first period and leave it to your wife. Still, taking the simpler road isn’t always the right choice.
What happens if you two are home alone and your wife isn’t available when it happens? The fact you’re a man shouldn’t stop you from having the talk about menstruation with your daughter.
By approaching her with understanding and care, you will show interest for the things she’s going through. By avoiding talking about it to her, you can risk making her feel as if there’s something shameful in it.
Her First Bra
This is another natural event that shouldn’t be taboo. Though it’s just another piece of clothing, the first bra can be a very emotional experience for your daughter.
She’ll probably know little about them, so you should do your best to be informed. First, talk with her about why she needs one – it can be because she actually needs the support and coverage or because she wants to feel more accepted among her peers.
Find a reliable retailer such as Leonisa which has a wide range of options which are comfortable and age appropriate.
Adolescence comes with more noticeable hair growth in different places. Your teen girl will surely want to remove hair from certain places at any cost. You should be the responsible one and point out various ways how can she do it with their pros and cons.
One of the most common and safest (if the blades are changed regularly and if the skin surface is moisturized) ways of removing hair in the beginning is shaving. Other ways, such as waxing, laser, depilatories and electrolysis have their advantages and drawbacks.
Here’s a little something to test your nerves. You can witness your daughter transform from a joyful, kind and cooperative child to an argumentative, sullen and impossible-to-get-along-with teen and feel helpless about it.
You should understand this is a part of the growing up process, as your child is searching for her individuality in this confusing world. The only thing you can do here is to be supportive.
Don’t try to be the “cool dad” who’s more a friend than a father. Live up to your role as a parent, but do not point out your supremacy, but try to find some middle ground. Set a good example, admit your mistakes and talk with her about your teen days. Find out if she has any problems and try to brainstorm the solution together.
This is arguably the toughest teen-experience for fathers. Yes, your little girl is all grown up and she is starting, not only to go out with her friends, but also to date guys.
Every dad dreads the door bell bringing some angst-ridden, scarily-dressed boy has come to pick up his daughter. Still, that day will come and it’s better to discuss it before she begins dating.
Talk to your daughter about how a guy should treat a girl on a date. Take your daughter out on dates to reinforce your words. Explain to her you respect her choices and trust her. If you oppose, it’s more likely she’ll find some “inappropriate” boy just to spite you.
You can do it dad! Good luck!
Stepdads should partner with their wives to get insight into the level of involvement and support your daughter will be comfortable with and accepting of from you. Factors coming into play would be how long you have been in your daughter’s life and more importantly the level of rapport, safety and trust you have with her.
Click here to get the first two of five tips for stepdad’s raising stepdaughter’s.