Replacing a child’s father is pretty tough if not futile. In fact, that shouldn’t be your goal as a stepdad.
Instead, you should be coming alongside the biodad and joining him in parenting. However, you can establish a healthy relationship with your stepchild.
Understanding and patience are essential to building an emotional connection with your stepchild. Tragically, the media has played a significant role in portraying the relationship between a stepparent and stepchildren as negative.
If you are yet another stepfather out there, try to understand your stepchild inside out. Your wife is an invaluable resource in this regard – she knows her children.
These are some useful tips to help you build and maintain a loving relationship with your stepchild.
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Keep the First Meeting Short
It’s often perceived a more extended first meeting will help establish a connection with your stepchild quicker. However, the shorter the encounter, the better the chance of an eventual relationship.
Kids tend to withdraw when they feel pressured. Make the first meeting short and straightforward.
Allow your stepchild the opportunity to set the pace of the relationship. Also, keep your expectations low – remember it will take time and patience to bulid a bond.
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Spend Quality Time with your Stepchild
Divorces or the death of a parent are often hard on a child. Remember your stepchild didn’t expect you to come into the picture.
So be ready to go an extra mile to win him or her over. The easiest way to do this is by spending quality time together.
Play dates, picnics or a family vacation are great ways to bond with your stepchild. Buying gifts for your stepchild is also a way to bond and nurture a relationship.
Well, you can even save huge on tickets and hotel bookings through curated coupon websites like CouponsMonk and DealsPlus. Just be careful not to go overboard with the gifts – it can prove to be very expensive.
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Let your Stepchild Vent
In instances where there was a divorce, your stepchild may still be hurt about the separation. They may try to sabotage your union with your wife.
Frequently, stepchildren often do this with the hope of getting their biological parents back together. Give them enough room for grieving and continue to support your stepchild with love and understanding.
Sooner or later, your stepchild will begin to warm up towards you.
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Allow Solo Time with Mom
It’s recommended you shouldn’t always be with your wife’s when she needs to spend some time with her kids. Give enough time for the children to bond with her.
By getting enough personal time with their mom, they will become more receptive towards you. Also, your stepchild will bond better with you when they maintain a relationship with their biodad.
So, these are some of the ways you can allow your relationship with your stepchild flourish. Give love, and you will eventually get love.
If you want to have the best possible experience and avoid the booby traps and landmines there are some specific things to know and do to get the very best out of your stepdad experience. Here are some stepdadding do’s and don’ts.
