Stepparenting is challenging. Mother’s Day is an annual reminder of those challenges. It’s a day when children in blended families break out in hives trying to figure out how to celebrate all of their mothers – without hurting anyone’s feelings.
It’s a day when stepmothers brace themselves for the reminders they will certainly face – reminders they’re not their stepchildren’s “real” mothers. But now, there’s a new holiday that will certainly offset the affliction that the second Sunday of May causes blended families each year.
This holiday is Stepmother’s Day, and this year it falls on May 16th. The roles stepmothers play in the lives of their stepchildren are more important than most people realize.
Stepmothers should be cherished for many reasons, and each blended family has its own unique reasons to celebrate the stepmom in their home.
Five reasons stepmoms should be celebrated:
1. They have a lot of the same duties as biological moms.
- Stepmoms often share some of the same financial, emotional, and spiritual duties as their stepchildren’s biological mothers. Some stepmoms may even have more responsibilities than biological mothers, taking on the role of the primary caregiver.
2. They love and support their spouse, which helps their stepchildren.
- Stepmoms breathe new life into previously fractured families. The kids may not have always been the most welcoming to their stepmother, but her role can facilitate positive changes in their father to improve their own relationship. Even the most stubborn kids can’t help but warm up once they see how happy their dad is with their stepmom and how they benefit from her love too.
3. They can be a lifeline in tough times.
- Stepmoms often become the go-to person for their stepchildren. There may be some resistance at first, but once stepkids realize that stepmoms play a more supporting (and less disciplinarian) role than a “typical” parent, that resistance dissolves. They can help with everything from school projects to love advice.
4. They love because they choose to.
- Stepmoms are not obligated to love their stepchildren as their own. They don’t have the biological drive to care for their stepchildren. Instead, they make the conscious choice to do so.
5. A stepparent relationship can be different, and sometimes better, than a biological parent relationship.
- As previously mentioned, stepmoms have slightly different roles than biological parents. They provide a support system and more of a coaching/mentoring role than that of a disciplinarian. This allows them to form a strong bond with their stepchildren that isn’t hindered by constantly enforcing rules.
If there’s a stepmother in your life, take the time to let her know she’s greatly appreciated and regarded.
