The following is a review by step-dad Tony Caldwell from the website Nights and Weekends.com.
Before I tell you about this book, I need to tell you why I read it. I had a couple of kids in my first marriage, so it’s not like I was totally clueless here.
Last June, I got married for a second time, and this bride came with a ready-made family of three kids. But this gal’s youngest was a boy, and my kids were girls. That posed a bit of a problem.
I knew that I was going to need some help on this one. The little guy had spent maybe—and I’m being nice here—a whopping six months around his male biological parent.
Other than that, women had raised him. My new mother-in-law had bought a book to help her daughter raise her son, but it was still on the shelf—unread. It was Bringing Up Boys by Dr. James Dobson.
I’d read Dobson’s book on disciplining kids during my first marriage, which had some excellent tips. This book was worth a shot.
At this point, it is my duty as a book reviewer to provide you with something of a disclaimer. Dr. Dobson is a devout Christian and doesn’t hide that from the reader.
He wears it like a badge of honor and touts some very conservative beliefs. If that bothers you or you already have an opinion of him and his ideals, you can stop reading now.
Again, if you believe that way, too, you probably have already read the book and can quit here. If you fall somewhere between those two sets of ideologies, keep reading.
In Bringing Up Boys, Dr. Dobson espouses some pretty strange ideas. Things like there are fundamental differences between boys and girls—and those differences are good things, and we should embrace them.
He explains such a thing as right and wrong, and we should teach that to our sons. According to him, parents are in charge of the house, and the kids, especially boys, should respect them.
He seems to be pretty sure that two parents in the house are better than just one and that both parents need to be active in their young boys’ lives to grow up and be good men. The point is also made that all kids—that includes boys—will emulate the behavior they see at home-pretty strange and scary stuff.
He gives practical tips for how to help your son do better in school and act better in general. Each chapter of the book ends with a question and answer session that takes his theories and shows the parent how to put them into practice. On that hand, it’s a great book.
The book also denounces a couple of topics in very strong terms. He speaks out boldly for an entire chapter on homosexuality and the harm he sees it doing to society. Dr. Dobson takes on the feminist elite of the nation as one of the primary reasons for the high number of dysfunctional males in America.
His position on these topics is exactly what you would expect from someone with his background. He also bashes dads that leave their families instead of staying to raise them. Yes, he’s a fundamentalist, but I’ve already warned you.
Don’t let the fact this book was written by a fundamentalist keep you from reading it. This is an excellent guide to raising a young man. Like any guidebook, it’s not exact and won’t solve all your problems. It will give you insight into how boys are wired and what makes them who they are.
Please read the book; use the parts that make sense and discard the rest. Then go outside and play catch with your son. Do something that tells him you love him. You can ride bikes, hit golf balls with him, build a tree house together or just talk to him.
To add this book to your library, click here.
