A woman’s touch. Whether people are commenting on the bareness of a new home or a shoddily wrapped Christmas present, the tone is the same.
A wistful sigh, a head tilt and there it is: “It could do with a woman’s touch.” Not only is the statement massively sexist, it 1) implies that all women have this magic creative flair and 2) that men don’t, but it’s also just untrue.
For instance, what about all the great male artists, fashion designers and hosts from interior design-based TV shows out there?! A man can have the right touch, too.
And in the same way, a father can possess that elusive talent: the mother’s touch. We may have been conditioned to believe the maternal bond is stronger than a paternal relationship.
But this might not be the case. Because new dads produce as much oxytocin as new mums do when spending time with their newborns; it manifests in different ways.
After all, bonds are what we make, not simply what we’re born with. With that in mind, take note, dads!
You are as capable of getting your little one to sleep as their mum is. (So no excuses when you don’t want to get up for the 4th time in one night!)
Here are a few tips you can try to soothe your baby and send them to Snoozeville:
1) Start with a Degree of Separation
This can be a tricky one to establish. Your partner might not be on board with it at first, but it’s a crucial one to start in the early stages.
Because allowing your baby to sleep between the two of you isn’t doing the three of you any favors regarding sleep. Sure, it might work in the short-term, and you can enjoy some nights of relatively undisturbed sleep…but habits form quickly and are hard to break.
Meaning you’re looking at a lot more tantrums and sleepless nights down the line.
Do your family a favor: get bubs to settle down in their space at an early stage. You’ll all sleep much better as a result.
2) Be Silly
Often dads are left playing the jokers. The mom can gently hush and sing.
The dad makes ridiculous noises and faces to soothe a crying little one and help him/her calm down. It may be unfair, but it’s often just the way it is.
Embrace your role as the clown in the relationship. Be as silly as you like.
Do a little dance, make up a song, put on squeaky voices for storytime, peek-a-boo, coo and crimp as much as it takes for your baby’s eyelids to start fluttering with happy drowsiness. Although remember to keep the volume down and your expressions less Jokeresque and more like Baloo the Bear.
You don’t want to be giving them nightmare with your thespian antics.
3) Enjoy Skin-on-Skin Time
Babies love skin-on-skin time with both mommy and daddy. Why?
Well, it feels incredibly soothing, for one. Plus there’s the bonus of your physical presence being so close; your baby will feel in a safe and secure environment, the ideal set-up for sleep.
Their temperature, heart and breathing rates become steadier and their blood sugar more stable. Sleep, which seemed impossible five minutes ago, can now be moments away.
Try this method in the evenings right before baby’s bedtime. Sitting in your boxers or dressing gown, allow your baby to rest on your chest while you’re watching TV (nothing too exciting like a big game so you don’t startle them!) or better still, while you read them a story.
That way, your baby gets used to your scent and voice while the rhythm of your heartbeat eases them into slumber.
Tip: When moving them into their crib afterwards, try not to break the spell. Get up gently, still murmuring to them softly, and slooowly make your way upstairs, rocking them oh-so-slightly as you go.
Take care not to disturb them when placing them down and keep your hand lightly on their chest once you do, so they continue to feel your presence as they settle back into a deep sleep.
Oh, and don’t forget to set their bedroom up as a sleep sanctuary prior to their bedtime. Have the lights dimmed and lullabies/white noise playing so that harsh lights or an unwelcome environment won’t case them to stir at this crucial moment.
Try these sleepy techniques tonight and see if they make a difference. Who knows, you might even get a few hours of unbroken sleep!
Sweet dreams to you, and to your family.
Even though your newborn sleeps a lot – as much as 17 hours a day, you still feel exhausted because your new child isn’t sleeping for more than one to two hour stretches at a time. Learn tips for helping your baby establish positive sleep habits.
