Humor

Black Friday Jokes And One Liners ~ Black Friday Humor

Black Friday is the most popular shopping holiday. The holiday has more shoppers than other shopping holidays during Thanksgiving week, like Cyber Monday and Small Business Saturday. Here are a few facts you may not know about the unique tradition of Black Friday.


  • In the 1800’s, the term “Black Friday” referred to stock market crashes.

  • Black Friday is the busiest day for plumbers. CNN explained plumbers are needed to clean up after guests “overwhelm the system”.
  • Black Friday has spread to over 15 countries in the world. For several years, Canadian retailers would worry when their customers traveled to the States on Black Friday in search of great deals, which forced them to start their own Black Friday deals. Today various countries have adopted this tradition including the UK, Brazil, India, France, Norway, and numerous others.

  • Twelve percent of the Black Friday shoppers are drunk.

Please stay safe and healthy while you’re out shopping. Enjoy these 15 jokes and one-liners about the biggest shopping day of the year.

1. What do Black Friday shoppers and the Thanksgiving turkey have in common? They know what it’s like to be jammed into a small place and stuffed!

2. Black Friday is a scam. You should be mad they overcharge you 364 days a year.

3. How can you tell which one of your friends got a good Black Friday deal? Don’t worry they’ll let you know.

4. How can you be more considerate on Black Friday? By turning your phone horizontally before recording the shopping brawls.

5. What did Nala tell Simba after seeing a herd of women on Black Friday? You gotta Mufasa!

6. Black Friday: Because only in America people trample others for sales exactly one day after being thankful for what they already have.

7. Here’s hoping Black Friday won’t turn into Black and Blue Saturday.

8. Black Friday = Broke Saturday.

9. Who profits the most on Black Friday? The folks who were smart enough to stay home.

10. Why do shoppers feel like cranberry juice on Black Friday? They get bruised and battered bloody by other people until they get squeezed at the cashier.

11. Black Friday is so hypocritical. one day you’re thankful for everything you have then the next day you’re fighting over TVs & stuff on sale.

12. Why do shoppers feel like cranberry sauce on Black Friday? They get bruised, battered, and squished into pulp trying to get to the bargain bin.

13. I’ll be celebrating Black Friday in my traditional way – by completely ignoring it.

14. Black Friday is more like the Hunger Games, and the winner gets $10 off a toaster.

15. It’s Black Friday and the mall is packed with shoppers and Steve can’t find his wife. Steve goes up to a very attractive woman and says ‘Excuse me, can you help me? I cannot see my wife, and I know that she is here in the shopping mall somewhere. Can you just talk to me for a couple of minutes?” The attractive woman replies “Why?” Steve replies “Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman, my wife materializes out of thin air.”

“He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has.” ~ Epictetus

Looking for ideas on what to get your kids for Christmas? Check out The Best Things To Buy On Black Friday For Kids.

About the author

About the author

In 1995, Gerardo Campbell married into a blended family, becoming the stepdad to his wife’s two children. In 2011, he started Support for Stepfathers to reverse the nearly 70% divorce rate for blended families in the US. His website is to help and inspire stepfathers, aspiring stepfathers, and the women who love them. You can follow Support for Stepdads on Twitter and Facebook.

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