There’s a new buzzword making the rounds #momshaming. If you haven’t yet heard of the concept, it’s most likely because the term hasn’t had a name until recently.
Moms may get the brunt of it as they are traditionally the caregivers in the family. However, this unpleasant and opinionated judgement isn’t limited to moms.
In fact, many parents, dads included, have at some stage of their parenting careers come under its critical scrutiny. What is mom or parent shaming exactly?
The truth is, we all have our off days where we won’t be winning any parenting awards, and that’s okay. Here are some areas where parenting choices come under attack.
Breastfeeding in Public
This topic comes with a collection of viewpoints. What it comes down to is baby needs to be fed, and when out and about.
A public toilet is no environment for a baby to get a meal.
Culturally, it’s understandable there are more conservative beliefs that may find open breastfeeding offensive. For those with this belief should feel free to look away and for moms who embrace the natural act of breastfeeding, wonderful.
But how about a little middle ground. There are settings which are more or less appropriate and may call for a little consideration.
Breastfeeding moms can do their best to cover up, and should a little “nip-slip” occur, onlookers, should feel free to redirect your gaze.
Sleep Choices
Co-sleeping is another controversial topic. According to some, a baby should never share a bed with a parent, but who is anyone to judge?
A parent is tuned into the needs of their children and sleeping arrangements are not evidence of poor parenting, they are simply the most workable solution for that family.
If you’re one of those parents working on getting your child into their own bed, consider investing in a daybed or trundle bed. Wellworthliving.com has a few options and ideas you may want to consider if this is the next step in your sleep journey.
They allow your child to get used to sleeping in thier own bed while you remain close by. But only when you’re ready!
All children differ and have varying needs. On one side of the spectrum, you have perfect sleepers that need little to no attention and on the other end, parents sleep with children for years.
Neither scenario means you love your children more or less. Fighting the most natural solution will only leave you sleep deprived and exhausted.
Discipline & Boundries
This is the most heated parenting issue, attracting regular debate. If you’ve ever watched as a toddler thrashes at full tantrum in the mall, you’ll know it’s pretty tough not to form an opinion.
There are sadly a few too many meddling onlookers. Some who even feel the need to record the “scandal” post it on their social feeds, along with a detailed assessment of course.
Too strict or not strict enough is a difficult spectrum to navigate. Individual circumstances differ widely.
A loss or sickness in the family, special needs children or single parents are a few examples of circumstances that can make parenting challenging. Even the most ideal family arrangements come with obstacles, there is no black or white here, it’s called life!
As a bystander, you can’t have all the facts. You don’t know the individual circumstances that lead to raised voices or even a spanking. Trust that every loving parent is doing the best they can with what they have to work with.
Of course, there are cases of child abuse where genuine concern can raise awareness and even save a child’s life, just be sure you have the facts.
Education & Development
Traditional Schooling, Montessori, Home Schooling, Unschooling and Private Schooling. Who’s to say one is better than the next?
How about we let each person pick his personal preference and get on with what we want for our own child. Who’s baby walked from how many months or said his first word by when?
Albert Einstein wrote, “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it’s stupid.”
Children are beautifully unique and develop at different stages. What one child excels at is not a failing in another child who does not share the same strength.
Where Do You Stand?
Stand for the choices that serve you best. As for everyone else, allow them that same freedom.
Stand against the gossip mongers and the bored individuals who find fulfillment in the harsh judgement of others.
Compassion is a choice and it’s infinitely more constructive. Instead of offering up criticism, offer up help and support and strengthen parents that are having a tough time.
Goodness knows we all have those moments. Sadly, a lot of this criticism comes from within the extended family.
In the interest of educating those who feel themselves qualified to pass judgement, “We are happy for your personal choices, but we’ll be doing what works for us and your opinion holds no power.”
Sometimes finding a support community as a parent or stepparent is the best way to find advice and have a place to vent about them.
One of the ways you can do this is through blogging. You might be amazed by the feedback and support you’ll get online.
So how do you even get started blogging your way through parenting struggles? Here are some simple steps and tips.
