Breakups are always difficult. Divorces are even worse.
Divorces take a psychological, physical and a financial toll to boot. Finding love again is generally at the bottom of your priorities list, something distant and out of reach.
However, that’s not necessarily the case. While it maybe a long, arduous path, finding love after a divorce is possible.
Here are some ideas on how to find love after divorce.
Grieve Properly
It shouldn’t come as a shock, divorce comes with a lot of grieving. It can be similar to grieving a death.
There’s always a healing period. It’s going to take time.
However you may grieve, it’s not wise to dive right back into the dating pool. You leave a piece of yourself too exposed – an open wound that hasn’t completely healed.
For example, having a hobby can help with this healing process. Also consider taking up something soothing like yoga, reading or meditating.
Let Go of The Resentment
After a harsh divorce, it can be easy to resent the opposite sex. This is especially true if the divorce ended on a bitter note.
This doesn’t mean stuffing it deep down or attempting to hide it. You need to learn how to permanently let go of it.
This won’t be easy and it may require significant time with a marriage family therapist. If you want to move on it’s something you are going to have to do.
Avoiding the issue and resenting the opposite sex and putting up a metaphorical wall will stymie your ability for finding another great love.
Start Out Slow
It can be difficult to meet singles these days. This is especially true if you’re older or only visit spots you and your ex frequented.
This probably not only brings up unwanted feelings, but it makes the whole situation even more awkward. There are plenty of ways to take it slow.
One unusual idea is to call a dating chat line. Hey, why not?
You’re in a new chapter of your life. It’s about mixing it up, trying new things and approaching it from the right headspace and pace.
Stop Comparing
One of the biggest problems newly divorcés face is constantly comparing new romantic prospects to their ex. It might be true you were completely in love with your old love at one time, but there’s a reason it didn’t work out.
You can’t go into a new relationship and expect the new individual to have and possess the same qualities as your ex. Just because your ex was 5 feet 9 inches with blonde hair and blue eyes doesn’t mean you should go out and seek another mate with those same features.
In fact, it might be a good thing if you look for someone different with something a little different to offer.
