Often those that are in the process of divorce are confused as to how to handle various aspects of the dying marriage. Some consider divorce mediation, but maybe they second guess the method because they think it will be too costly, or it will take away their ability to have a say in the divorce.
There are a lot of misconceptions about divorce mediation – about how it works and who it works for. Perhaps you were resisting divorce mediation because you believe one of these widely accepted myths. If you have doubts about this type of divorce process, read on to see if perhaps some of your fears or hesitations are stemming from misconceptions.
Misconception: Mediation Is For Couples Wanting To Reconcile
Some assume utilizing a mediator is only reserved for those attempting to work on their marriage. Mediation is done to assist in the divorce process in a more compassionate manner compared to litigation. Through this method the couple has the final say in how they will settle their arrangements. It is in fact used for couples who want to terminate the relationship, just in a gentler, more reasonable fashion.
Misconception: The Couple Must Get Along In Order For The Process To Work
Many people feel they will not be able to engage in mediation or it will not be effective if the participants are not on good terms. In reality, most couples involved in divorce are not on the best of terms.
The term mediation means to negotiate and facilitate, so the purpose is to allow two opposing forces to come to some sort of agreement.
Misconception: Once Seeking Mediation, The Divorce Will Mainly Involve Money
Money is only one aspect of a marriage, thus it will only involve part of a divorce. Property may need to be divided for more reasons than financial gain, such as shared interest or family connection. If children are involved, the allocation of money should be less of a priority. No matter what your priorities are, seeking divorce mediation won’t automatically turn your divorce into a money battle. With the help of mediation, you and your spouse can state what you want financially, and perhaps an agreement can be reached.
Misconception: The Mediator Will Control The Terms Of The Settlement
The mediator’s role is to listen to and direct both parties in order to gain a clear understanding of their intentions. Only those involved can make a final say in what is best for them or the relationship. The mediator will help guide the process while the couple will essentially determine the outcome. The whole point of seeking mediation is to come to reasonable agreements that allow both you and your spouse to get what you want. However, many divorcing couples still assume mediation will force them to live with terms set by a mediator.
Misconception: It Will Take Just As Much Time And Effort As It Would To Litigate
In reality, using a mediator helps save time in handling a divorce. Negotiations are made with the couple present, having the ability to converse and agree on their own. With the help of an attorney, each spouse engages with their attorney and both parties must pass information along this route. Since most divorcing couples are not on good terms, mediation is a much better route than litigation because the couple won’t have to interact as much, and the divorce will be over quicker, allowing them to go their separate ways. Mediation allows couples to avoid a long, messy divorce and is more likely to help them get what they want.
Mediation is an option for those that would like to avoid some of the additional frustration or pain that may accompany divorce. Before becoming involved, however, it is imperative to eliminate false assumptions about the process. As you can see, there are plenty of misconceptions that would keep anyone in the divorce process from seeking mediation, but once you know the truth about this process, you’ll see it can be a helpful tool in facilitating a fast, fair divorce. Information for this article was provided by lawyers in Newfoundland at Gittens & Associates who specialize in family law along with other legal services.
