Our children are incredibly cute one minute and little monsters the next! They are so unpredictable they often seem to possess a split personality. In reality our children are just growing up and experimenting with boundaries as they start to develop. When you are forced to discipline your child, it can be a heart breaking and difficult exercise, and there is no guarantee the lesson will be learned. We all have our special ways of enforcing a point and they are often less than successful. This article looks at ways in which we can use the child’s faux pas as part of the lesson we are trying to teach them.
The Reaction to Being Caught
None of us enjoy being told we have just made a mistake and our kids are no different in this respect. They often start to cry when we catch them in the act of doing something we deem as bad or naughty. The last thing that they want right now is to be giving a lecture or punishment. When you were told off by your own parents, they often acted in a way that made you fear them.
This is not the result we want when we are trying to educate our children about what is right and what is wrong. When your kids find themselves in a situation that causes them to be afraid of the consequences, they will usually agree to anything just to alleviate the unpleasantness of the moment. This will not really have any positive effects on their future behavior.
Do Not Show Disappointment!
Cast your minds back to your childhood, think about a time when your parents told you how angry or disappointed they have been with you for some reason. You probably felt about one inch tall and lost sight of the actual activity that led up to this unpleasant tirade.
Your kids need to learn about mistakes, but they can do without the nasty feelings this kind of conversation can lead to. Of course you will feel angry and frustrated, but remember your children have not developed their emotions fully yet and can be easily affected badly by such an outburst.
Show The Consequences, But In A Loving Way
The best way to allow your kids to understand the mistakes that they have made is by letting them see the consequences of their actions. Let them know that you are not happy about this event, and ask them to think about why they have done this. Ask them to consider what is wrong with their actions and how that can ensure it will not be repeated again. Give them plenty of time to formulate a response, because this isn’t something they can do easily.
Punishment?
You can also ask your child about what type of discipline should be enforced for their actions. This will empower them a little and may help to enforce the message a little more effectively. Allow them as long as they like to figure out suitable responses to your questions.
Results
If you follow this route you should be able to remain calm and allow your child a little dignity whilst mulling everything over. Once they have realised the fault in their actions and decided on their punishment, you can give them a big hug and get back to being a great team once more!
Thomas Xavier is a stay-at-home dad. Just like stay-at-home moms, he also loves blogging about his activities and shares his experiences through his blogs. One of the things children love, according to him, is having clothes with kids name labels on them.
