There can be all kinds of circumstances that lead you to end up in a relationship with someone and it is certainly possible for you to be relatively new to knowing them when you do. This mystery tends to make it all that bit more exciting but it can be problematic too because how much do you really know about them and their life?
Alternatively, you may have been familiar for a long time with your new partner or the person you are seeing and you could be fully aware of how long ago they parted ways with their previous boyfriend, fiancé or husband. It is natural to wonder if they have genuinely moved on from this relationship and when you are uncertain about this it can have a significant impact on the quality of your time together.
Are you Just a Rebound?
Few experiences are quite as difficult to bear as rejection in any way at all, let alone when it comes from the person that you have invested so much time and emotion in as part of your relationship together. This can rear its head in more than one way when you have doubts over whether she has truly got over her ex.
First, it may have been her who ended the relationship and she may be deliberating over whether she made the right decision to hurt her ex in such a way. It is also possible her former love brought it to an end and is now having second thoughts. Feeling you may have been a rebound is a horrible thought to have but there are signs to look out for.
How Regular is the Contact?
A certain amount of sensitivity is required in some situations when your new partner is still in touch with their ex. Examples of this are if they have children together or if there was a bereavement that has an impact on your partner and her ex.
In your mind you will tell yourself not to get worked up about it but human nature tends to work the other way. Insisting they cut all contact with their ex is not a good way to go but you may have to consider if they really need to be talking or seeing each other quite as much as they are.
Are you Being Compared to Him?
When you fall for someone it can be natural to want to picture in your mind they were never involved with anyone else before you.
It is never particularly enjoyable hearing about their ex and it is even worse being compared to him so pay attention to this one.
Is She Holding on to Reminders?
It is impossible to completely cut off your feeling for someone straight away but when you become involved with her you should be as sure as possible that she has moved on.
You can be oblivious to these signs when you are caught up in the attraction but one of the classic indicators that she may not be ready is her keeping items that remind her of their time with each other.
Sara Kyle was in a rebound relationship herself and also has over a decade of experience in providing relationship guidance for couples.
