I’ve been hurt before, bad enough to end a relationship I thought was forever. This makes me extremely cautious. If you pressure me to move too fast I might give in for a time, but I won’t feel good about it. You’ll probably lose me. Pursue me but do it gently. There’s no rush.
As a single mom, I don’t have a lot of time to spend with you. In addition to my career, I’m the mom, taxi, tutor, coach, chef, referee, and cleaning lady; the list goes on and on! I may only be able to set aside 3 or 4 times a month to be with you. If you can tolerate, appreciate and respect that our relationship will grow – albeit slowly – but it will grow.
When I’ve determined you’re “a keeper,” you’ll meet my kids – and not a second before. Bringing someone into my children’s lives is a very big deal. I decided long ago my household would not be a revolving door of men coming and going. I know there’s no guarantee of a future with you, but I need to have a really good feeling about us before I involve my kids. At that point, we’ll be able to spend more time together because the kids can be involved in our time too.
I’ve loved my kids longer than I’ve known you and I love them more than you or maybe just differently than I love you. Don’t take this personally and don’t try to compete with it. It means I’m a woman of integrity – and that’s something you want – I guarantee it.
Don’t rush in as a father figure and disciplinarian. That’s a privilege that must be earned. Just hang out with my kids. Make an honest effort to get to know them and learn what is unique and special about them. You don’t need to bring gifts and spend tons of money on them. Your time, attention and making them feel important are the most precious commodities you can offer. When you do that it will make you irresistible to me too.
If any of this sounds too harsh, it might be dating a single mom just isn’t for you. And that’s okay. It doesn’t make you a bad person. It’s not for everyone. But with patience and understanding you’ll find a dedicated single mom – will make an amazing lover and friend.
If your ready to date a single mom read these three crucial tips.
