Many people view abuse as a physical act because there’s clear evidence of irrational actions that can be readily proven. But abuse in a relationship can take many forms, both physical and psychological, scarring victims in many different ways.
Besides, some people show these abusive signs later in relationships or cover them up initially to gain trust.
Physical or emotional abuse can scar individuals for the rest of their lives, causing future paranoia and mental disorders. Identifying and stopping acts of abuse is essential – hopefully, these five warning signs will help you determine if you may be in danger.
Are You In Trouble?
But I Didn’t Mean It!
Simple signs of aggression may seem harmless to many men or women in a relationship. Understand human beings are naturally compulsive individuals. It takes time and hard work to become disciplined, right?
If you’re with your partner and they grab you hard, “accidentally” push you or threaten you, it’s time to hit the road.
Is My Partner Isolating Me?
Many abusive relationships are psychological, causing the victim to question whether they’re at fault or not. Healthy and normal relationships require a balance of work, fun, family, and friends.
If your partner isolates you and doesn’t allow you to hang out with other people, particularly people of the opposite sex, the relationship may be heading towards abuse.
It’s Not Me. It’s you
This is one of the most common warning signs of an abusive relationship. Does your partner ever take responsibility for his or her actions?
This is a huge sign of an unhealthy relationship involving insecurity and immaturity. Eventually, this could propel into a verbally abusive conversation.
If you allow your partner to get away with this – it could lead to physical abuse.
Why Are You Always Drunk?
Even if you only drink recreationally, alcohol still enhances behavior and leads to erratic decisions. If a person is naturally aggressive and drinks alcohol excessively, chances are you will eventually see heighten anger at some point.
If you ever feel unsafe or scared in the presence of your own significant other – leave now! Alcohol abuse leads directly to verbal and physical abuse in a hurry. Many shootings and domestic violence cases have alcohol at their foundation.
Why Are You Manipulating Me?
Have you ever been in a relationship where your counterpart says, “I hate you, you’re a terrible person,” but then tells you they love you the next day? This is more common than it is scarce, and both parties often do it. The difference between irrational actions and abuse is a thin line, but it is predictable.
If your partner does this consistently, they are manipulating you. Sure, one or two irrational actions are something we’re all guilty of – it’s a part of being human.
But you should know when you see a manipulator as they are easy to sniff out. Ask yourself the following question, “Do I trust this person?” If you’re reasoning about your partner, the answer will reveal the truth.
If you do find yourself in an abusive relationship Marriage Family Therapist Karla Downing provides excellent advice in this post.
I wish to thank the author for this article. It is very true and I have faced this personally. It is painful to go thru this. The mental abuse really hurts .
Thank you Betty for your feedback, I’ll pass it to the author. I’m not quite sure how to read this but this particular post has had the highest readership over all the other posts over the past two months. Within a month I’ll be publishing a follow-up post titled, “What to do when find yourself in an abusive relationship.”
Gerardo
Excellent Article! Every point is head-on…
Thank you Ang for the compliment. Be on the look out for the follow-up post, “What to Do if You’re In An Abusive Relationship.” It’s scheduled for publishing before the end of March.
Gerardo
Excellent topic, thank you! I can’t even begin to express my anxiousness to read the follow up post you’ve mentioned. I’ll definitely be watching for it with wide eyes!
You’re welcome Maggie. Thank you for your continued patience the follow-up post should be up before the end of the month.
Gerardo
It is far more abusive to agree with things that send people to physical hell. Aggression doesn’t quite sum up the Issue, when it comes to physchological abuse… (when physical violence usually follows), Because of what deeply abusive humans convince you of, usually comes spoken politely. Abuse comes in all tones and manners of delivery, protect yourself from physical hell.
Thank you Julianne for your comment. You’re right abuse comes in many varieties. While the evidence of physical abuse is obvious it’s the more subtle forms which are probably the most insidious.
Gerardo
I spent 11 years of unimaginable physical, mental and verbal abuse. There were times when I felt like a vegetable for days. The emptiness, hopelessness and darkness around me would have ate me alive if I didn’t have my two kids. I stood up again, looked at them, picked them up and ran away.
It is difficult to find out phsychological abuse, especially if you are naive. I was always made to feel I was wrong. It took me 3 years to figure out what was going on. But I’m glad I figured it out. I am out of that mental hell and life is normal and happy again. The whole experience made me realize how much I love my freedom. It’s the only thing that helped me come out of the situation despite of constant threats.
The point on isolating from friends and family is bang on. Beware of such people.
I agree with you Hope. Psychological abuse is probably the most difficult to identify. Freedom is always better than bondage. Thank you for sharing.
Gerardo