Humor

Stepfather’s Humor ~ Fun Facts

Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?

> >     A. Their birthplace.  7-11 is also an acceptable answer.  🙂

 

7-11 Convenience Store
7-11 Convenience Store

 

Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name ?

> >     A. Obsession; in the current economy FBO (For Sale by Owner)

Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter “A”?

> >     A. One thousand; I thought it was one, “a one, a two, a three…” 😉

Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?

> >     A. All invented by women.  They forgot to mention the other fine products below

Butter Stick
The Butter Stick – Don’t Leave Home Without It
Tissue to Go
Tissue to Go

Q. What is the only food that doesn’t spoil?

> >     A. Honey; also Twinkies and anything from McDonald’s.

Q. Which day are there more collect calls than any other day of the year?

> >     A. Father’s Day; what’s the message here?

In Shakespeare’s time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase……… “goodnight, sleep tight.”

It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride’s father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar-based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.

In English pubs, you can buy ale in pints and quarts… So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them “Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down.”  It’s where we get the phrase “mind your P’s and Q’s.”

Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups.  When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. “Wet your whistle” is the phrase inspired by this practice.  Personally, I miss throwing your glass on the floor.  😀
~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~

At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow… Not unless it’s salted first. 😛

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