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Jokes And Puns About Grocery Store Workers

Across the United States, more than two million people are grocery store workers. Classified as essential businesses, grocery stores and supermarkets are remaining open even in the communities worst-hit by the Coronavirus.

Grocery workers are at a higher risk for Covid-19 exposure because of their proximity and frequent interaction with customers and coworkers. Employers have responded with new safety measures like Plexiglas checkout partitions, masks, and protective gloves. 

Pay for most grocery workers is low. Grocery cashiers earn an average wage of about $10.93/hour. Employer-provided benefits are rare for non-unionized grocery workers.

Before the start of the pandemic, Walmart and Kroger, the country’s two largest grocery chains, offered hundreds of thousands of workers no paid sick leave.

Most large grocery chains have introduced temporary COVID-19 sick leave as well as one-time bonuses or hazard pay of an additional $2/hour.

When I think of grocery workers the following quote comes to mind

Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few. ~ Winston Churchill

Next time you’re in the grocery store let the clerks know you appreciate them.

1. Grocery store workers must let the customer decide if they want paper or plastic because baggers can’t be choosers.

2. Coronavirus has caused our local supermarket to sell out of pasta. All because of a fusilli people.

3. Whenever the cashier at the grocery store asks my brother if he would like the milk in a bag he replies, “No, just leave it in the carton!”

4. I was in the supermarket when I got a message on my cellphone telling me there were 24 singles in my area. Think I’m going to delete the Kraft Cheese app.

5. When cashing out at the grocery store it was obvious my cashier was high, slow as hell, and insulting me under their breath. I still don’t know if I like self-checkout.

6. I was behind a fat girl in tight jeans at the supermarket checkout. Her label said, “Guess?” I said, “ Oh I don’t know, 450 pounds?”

7. Do people think you are YOUNG or OLD? Here’s the test, fall on the fall in a supermarket. If everyone laughs, you’re YOUNG. If people run over to help, you’re OLD.

8. I bought six wine bottles in the supermarket. The cashier said, “Do you want a box?” I said, “Alright, buddy, but I’m not much of a fighter.”

9. Two Australians are fighting over the last loaf of bread at the supermarket. They’re both holding on to the loaf when one of them says, “It’s stale mate.”

10. Today at the supermarket. A can of coke fell on my head. I am lucky it was a soft drink

11. A man is at the checkout at the supermarket. He gives the cashier his groceries. One chicken breast, one potato, one carrot, one tomato, one bread roll, and one beer. The cashier asks, “Are you single?” He says, “Yes, how did you know?” She replies, “You’re really ugly!”

12. Cashier: Do you want cashback? Me: I mean who wouldn’t. There’s Ring of Fire, I Walk The Line. Let’s not forget his Christmas album

13. Cashier: Did you hear about the famous actress that stabbed her husband today? Customer: No who? Cashier: Reese…um…
Customer: Witherspoon? Cashier: No, with her knife!

14. Cashiers are always checking me out. That’s the closest I’ll ever get to a woman being interested in me.

15. I love to brag to people on how I handle financial transactions for a multi-billion dollar corp. It beats telling them I’m a  McDonald’s cashier.

16. I tried to buy one of those grocery checkout dividers but the cashier keeps putting it back.

17. I walked into the pet shop this morning and said to the cashier, “I bought two hamsters from you yesterday, but when I woke up this morning, they were both dead!” She frowned and replied, “I warned you about the hot weather. Did you give them plenty of water as I suggested?” “Yes, I filled their tank right to the top.”
 
18. Did you hear about the cashier who did tricks with the barcode machine but still charged full price? She was a scan artist.
 
19. I was at Walgreens this morning and I overheard an 80+ -year-old man tell a joke to the cashier. “You know the thing about dating now is – I never get to meet their parents!”
 
Thank you! To all the grocery store workers, thank you for working hard to keep our stores.
 
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About the author

About the author

In 1995, Gerardo Campbell married his now ex-wife becoming the stepdad to her two children. In 2011, he started Support for Stepfathers to reverse the nearly 70% divorce rate for blended families in the US. His website is to help and inspire stepfathers, aspiring stepfathers, and the women who love them worldwide. You can follow Support for Stepdads on Twitter and Facebook.

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