I first heard of the term “disengagement” when researching the various parenting styles. The disengaged parenting style is considered the most damaging parenting style to children. The experts state that stepdads typically adopt a disengaged parenting style than their biological counterparts.
Definition of Disengagement
- A way of protecting yourself and your biological children from being taken advantage of by the people living in your house.
- You are stopping your parenting role and responsibilities (transportation, game attendance, financial support, etc.) to your stepchildren.
- They were no longer doing anything that would allow your stepchildren to treat you with disrespect.
- Ends being taken for granted and other harmful things resulting from being a stepparent.
The goal of disengagement is to get your spouse to parent their children and reduce your stress. It isn’t to straighten out your stepchildren’s deficiencies. If the children are going to be unappreciative, let them be unappreciative of their mom.
The Father’s Story
The following is the Father’s story about disengagement. This Father wanted children. In preparation for the children’s arrival, He created a perfect and uncorrupted environment for them to live in. He made the heavens, the earth, and all the creatures on the planet. The Father created his son first and named him Adam from the ground.
He placed Adam in a lush and beautiful garden. The garden had delicious fruit for Adam to eat. The Father placed two particular trees in In the garden: the “tree of life” and the “tree of the knowledge of good and evil.” The Father established a boundary regarding the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.
The Father said, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden, but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it, you will surely die.”
Adam was given the job of naming the animals. Recognizing Adam needed help with his work and his loneliness, the Father placed Adam in a deep sleep and removed a rib creating Eve. Eve became Adam’s wife and helpmate. One day a serpent using trickery and deceit conned Eve into eating the forbidden fruit. In turn, Eve gave Adam the fruit for him to partake of.
The Aftermath
The Father was angry at the serpent for his deception and the disobedience of Adam and Eve. There were consequences for their actions, yet the Father continued to show His love and concern for his children.
- The Serpent. The serpent species were forced to crawl on their stomachs in the dirt, and they became the enemies of humankind.
- Adam and Eve.
- After eating the forbidden fruit, they made skirts of fig leaves, realizing their nakedness. The Father provided them with animal skins for covering.
- They were banned from the garden. The fruit from the trees was no longer available to them. Adam and the men after him would have to get their food by the sweat of their brow by toiling with the ground. Although not written, I’m sure the Father equipped Adam with knowledge about planting and growing crops.
- Eve and the women following her would experience pain in having children. Also, women would be subject to their husbands.
The disobedience of Adam and Eve had implications not just for them but for all of humanity. The Father had every justification for disengaging and leaving humankind to their deserved end.
Despite humanity’s disobedience, the Father never disengaged; He made provision for His son, Jesus Christ, to become a sacrifice for the sins of humankind, allowing us to be reconciled with Him. This holiday season, let’s soberly remember this sacrifice. Have you accepted Jesus’ sacrifice? It is as simple as sincerely repeating the following prayer.
I wish you and your families a very Merry Christmas and a healthy, safe, and prosperous New Year.
Gerardo
